Please Phil,can you stop abusive users?

Hi John,

I disagree, Roc was not mearly saying he found blah offensive, as I suggest should be done when you find something offensive.

That aside, I think saying you find something offensive is acceptable is all cases (qualified, of course I haven't thought of all cases). However, in some situations it will be out of context or irelevant. I think in the context of a forum, saying you are offended by something would most naturally be about what another person has written in that forum.

If something I write offends someone, I would like to hear it. That doesn't mean I will retract it, but I think I should know.
-Mark
In order to combat offensive behavior
people must stand up and say they find it offensive.

-Mark

--
[email protected]
--
John
--
[email protected]
 
Hi Dave,

I agree, so the offended party should just say so (civilly). No matter what the position is a first step is to say what offended you. In some cases this will have no effect, in others it will.

I can think of a couple times in my life that my behavior was changed because someone pointed out to me that it was offensive. Admittedly, at first I gave excuses.

Also several times in this forum, I found posts offensive and I told the poster. In some cases it was my reading of the post that needed changing, but no harm was done.
-Mark
The weakness of your arguement is that in most heated (but civil)
discussions on a public forum, someone is going to say something
that's offensive to somebody.

Dave
In order to combat offensive behavior
people must stand up and say they find it offensive.

-Mark

--
[email protected]
--
John
--
[email protected]
--
[email protected]
 
(chuckling) ..... chickens is chickens .. ducks is ducks ... and some folks have a life. Get one :) In the great cosmic scope of things ... does this post really matter?
Karl
Karl H. Timmerman M.A.,J.D.
http://www.karltimmerman.com
 
being as i aint read this thread i shoulnt really comment.. but i think its about whether or not we all need to learn to be more politically correct and be very carefull about what we say.. or whether we should learn to be less easily offended..

the world does have a place for nuns and children and others that are easily offended (the children aint but the adult watchers always are) but for me to always think i should cater for such folks very time i speak i would find intolerable..

this is about net censorship really.. some think that the net should be made into a place where their kids can roam freely and unsupervised.. i think such folks need to grow up and realise that the internet just like the real world is full of "offensive" things and those who think their kids should be allowed to freely roam it are being totally irresponsible parents.. and lazy ones as well..

as for the nuns.. they should stay in the nunnery.. or at least learn not be offended by the real world so much if they wish to leave the nunnery..

but over all to be too easlily offended and to say so.. is offensive in itself.. i go for the "be more tolerant of what we read" as opposed to the "be more carefull as to what we say.. arguement..

trog100
  1. #
In order to combat offensive behavior
people must stand up and say they find it offensive.

-Mark

--
[email protected]
--
John
--
[email protected]
 
Hi Trog,

I usually agree with your straigt forward logic, and I agree here partially. We don't necessarily all need to be more politically correct and watch what we write. However, blatent bashing based upon a persons personal life is not a "politically correct" issue. However again, it may still be permissable.

I like that in your opinion people who are easily offended (and say so) are offensive, and yet they have every right to continue being offended and saying so. It would almost seem you must be in this group of people being that you are so easily offened by people being offended (and say so) and you are saying so:)
Cheers,
Mark
the world does have a place for nuns and children and others that
are easily offended (the children aint but the adult watchers
always are) but for me to always think i should cater for such
folks very time i speak i would find intolerable..

this is about net censorship really.. some think that the net
should be made into a place where their kids can roam freely and
unsupervised.. i think such folks need to grow up and realise that
the internet just like the real world is full of "offensive" things
and those who think their kids should be allowed to freely roam it
are being totally irresponsible parents.. and lazy ones as well..

as for the nuns.. they should stay in the nunnery.. or at least
learn not be offended by the real world so much if they wish to
leave the nunnery..

but over all to be too easlily offended and to say so.. is
offensive in itself.. i go for the "be more tolerant of what we
read" as opposed to the "be more carefull as to what we say..
arguement..

trog100
  1. #
In order to combat offensive behavior
people must stand up and say they find it offensive.

-Mark

--
[email protected]
--
John
--
[email protected]
--
[email protected]
 
the thing i find most hard to tolerate is intolerance.. he he.. i do consider "holier than thow attitudes offensive".. sometimes straight forward logic is hard to put across.. but what puzzles me is that the world is so full of really offensive things that anything appearing in here for example should not cause meaningfull offense.. unless of course those being offended go around in blinkers most of the time.. as i am sure they do..

it is a question of "balance".. the scales can be tilted one way or tilted the other.. and u are correct about political correctness perhaps not being applicable in this case.. but these little arguement do happen and i dont think they should be censored out..

to me the scales are in danger being tilted a little to much as a general rule in the "watch what we say" direction.. i just do my little bit to try and shove em the other way..

mind u my oppinion is in the minority on this one i am sure..

i also probably offend more folks than most..

being "loved" while still being "me" is getting harder.. he he

trog100
  1. #
the world does have a place for nuns and children and others that
are easily offended (the children aint but the adult watchers
always are) but for me to always think i should cater for such
folks very time i speak i would find intolerable..

this is about net censorship really.. some think that the net
should be made into a place where their kids can roam freely and
unsupervised.. i think such folks need to grow up and realise that
the internet just like the real world is full of "offensive" things
and those who think their kids should be allowed to freely roam it
are being totally irresponsible parents.. and lazy ones as well..

as for the nuns.. they should stay in the nunnery.. or at least
learn not be offended by the real world so much if they wish to
leave the nunnery..

but over all to be too easlily offended and to say so.. is
offensive in itself.. i go for the "be more tolerant of what we
read" as opposed to the "be more carefull as to what we say..
arguement..

trog100
  1. #
In order to combat offensive behavior
people must stand up and say they find it offensive.

-Mark

--
[email protected]
--
John
--
[email protected]
--
[email protected]
 
Hi Trog

Yo save you from reading thirty minutes of posts...

This thread was started by a poster who was offended by the posts of two jerks. I don't necessarily blame her.

The first offensive post by Jerk 1 called jerk two a "liar."

Jerk two, noticed that Jerk 1 had included (in the middle of his post) a Web address. This particuler site was about Gay people. It had nothing to do with the discussion, so one wonders why he posted it as part of his arguement.

Jerk One then responded by called Jerk 2 an offensive term related to his sexuality.

My own feeling is that Kessler is correct in saying people should respond to flames by civily pointing out their stupidity. Rosie, the original poster, was right to be offended. OTOH I feel that while this is well and good, censorship is, as they say, a slippery slope and drawing lines leads to all sorts of problems.

Finally, I think that threads like this, may perhaps, shame people into being less offensive.

Dave
the world does have a place for nuns and children and others that
are easily offended (the children aint but the adult watchers
always are) but for me to always think i should cater for such
folks very time i speak i would find intolerable..

this is about net censorship really.. some think that the net
should be made into a place where their kids can roam freely and
unsupervised.. i think such folks need to grow up and realise that
the internet just like the real world is full of "offensive" things
and those who think their kids should be allowed to freely roam it
are being totally irresponsible parents.. and lazy ones as well..

as for the nuns.. they should stay in the nunnery.. or at least
learn not be offended by the real world so much if they wish to
leave the nunnery..

but over all to be too easlily offended and to say so.. is
offensive in itself.. i go for the "be more tolerant of what we
read" as opposed to the "be more carefull as to what we say..
arguement..

trog100
  1. #
In order to combat offensive behavior
people must stand up and say they find it offensive.

-Mark

--
[email protected]
--
John
--
[email protected]
 
Hi Dave,

I don't want to argue the orinal transaction, but I think this may make a difference on how you see it. "Jerk 1" as you have designated did not post this link in the middle of his post, it is simply a link to his home page as many people have. "Jerk 2" body copied it into the middle of his post.
-Mark
The first offensive post by Jerk 1 called jerk two a "liar."

Jerk two, noticed that Jerk 1 had included (in the middle of his
post) a Web address. This particuler site was about Gay people. It
had nothing to do with the discussion, so one wonders why he posted
it as part of his arguement.
--
[email protected]
 
The most intolerant people are the ones who preach tolerance the most. They are only tolerant of those who think like they do. And the rest are intolerant ba%$ #ds. :-)

I expect tolerant people to be tolerant of my intolerance :-) I said that once in a diversity class. Man did the instructor get mad, err intolerant!

Who decides what is offensive? What is offensive to me my not be to you. Or it may be offensive to you but not me.
it is a question of "balance".. the scales can be tilted one way or
tilted the other.. and u are correct about political correctness
perhaps not being applicable in this case.. but these little
arguement do happen and i dont think they should be censored out..

to me the scales are in danger being tilted a little to much as a
general rule in the "watch what we say" direction.. i just do my
little bit to try and shove em the other way..

mind u my oppinion is in the minority on this one i am sure..

i also probably offend more folks than most..

being "loved" while still being "me" is getting harder.. he he

trog100
  1. #
the world does have a place for nuns and children and others that
are easily offended (the children aint but the adult watchers
always are) but for me to always think i should cater for such
folks very time i speak i would find intolerable..

this is about net censorship really.. some think that the net
should be made into a place where their kids can roam freely and
unsupervised.. i think such folks need to grow up and realise that
the internet just like the real world is full of "offensive" things
and those who think their kids should be allowed to freely roam it
are being totally irresponsible parents.. and lazy ones as well..

as for the nuns.. they should stay in the nunnery.. or at least
learn not be offended by the real world so much if they wish to
leave the nunnery..

but over all to be too easlily offended and to say so.. is
offensive in itself.. i go for the "be more tolerant of what we
read" as opposed to the "be more carefull as to what we say..
arguement..

trog100
  1. #
In order to combat offensive behavior
people must stand up and say they find it offensive.

-Mark

--
[email protected]
--
John
--
[email protected]
--
[email protected]
 
Hi Kessler

You're right! Shame on me. Jerk number one has now been downgraded to the point where he's on the cusp of not being called a jerk by me. Sorry about slandering him...

Dave
The first offensive post by Jerk 1 called jerk two a "liar."

Jerk two, noticed that Jerk 1 had included (in the middle of his
post) a Web address. This particuler site was about Gay people. It
had nothing to do with the discussion, so one wonders why he posted
it as part of his arguement.
--
[email protected]
 
The most intolerant people are the ones who preach tolerance the
most.
Like the Taliban?
They are only tolerant of those who think like they do. And
the rest are intolerant ba%$ #ds. :-)
Like Martin Luther King?
I expect tolerant people to be tolerant of my intolerance :-) I
said that once in a diversity class. Man did the instructor get
mad, err intolerant!
Yes, because tolerance normally refers to colour, race, religion and sexual orientation, not to crime, voilence, ignorance, racial hatred or hard drugs. If you hadn't figured that out you were in the wrong class.
Who decides what is offensive? What is offensive to me my not be to
you. Or it may be offensive to you but not me.
Well, we have laws to protect the young, but we also have freedom of speech and expression. The price for that freedom is that other people have the right to take offense, disagree and argue with us. By exercising this freedom in an extreme way we all stand the risk of exposing ourselves as mad/crazy/dumb/bigoted in the minds of most others - though there may always be a minority that agree with us.

We all knew Scott was gay, he told everyone. Now we also know that Roc and a few other posters are homophobic. It appears that for the most part the rest of us find homophobia far more offensive so Roc will just have to live with the fact that many of do not think of him very highly.

However, this forum is NOT a public arena. Good manners on a forum can save everyone a lot of grief and should be upheld for the sake of the forum and out of respect for its owner. In that sense they both broke the rules but Roc went a lot further to the extent where ANY gay person on this forum would likely be offended. If Scott was coloured, would you have accepted a racist attack?? No? Ah, so you have your limits too then.
--
Steve
 
Do we have to put up with this kind of vile abuse, as in
- http://www.dpreview.com/forums/read.asp?forum=1010&message=3232833
Can anything be done?
It is really depressing!
Rosie
If you want political correctness and civility, go to

http://forums.gardenweb.com/forums/

or one of the other forums by the same owner.

There, I was reprimanded by the webmaster for saying, "Where do yo get such ideas?" Later, I was banned for arguing about the cause of blossom end rot in tomatoes. After someone is banned and they try to post a message, they are automatically sent to Disney.com.

Once, a woman posting a message referred her own lapse in judgement as "a blond moment." About 10 women attacked her for perpetuating stereotypes. Give me a break!

Personally, I think that creative people have better things to do than walk on eggshells. Although I support civilty, I am totally opposed to political correctness of every type. It would be better if everone developed a thicker skin and took it like a man. Ooops, sexism!
 
do you guys think that Phil should expell posters who put
inflamitory links in their signature? Scott did just that. I bet
if some poster had a link to a KKK site in his signature, you guys
would think he should be banished. What's the difference...they're
both lifestyle choices that some people find threatening and
offensive.
Expressing racists views and manifesting the physiological roots of what is considered "homosexuality" in the form of homosexual acts are completely different things. One thing (kkk racist views) is based completely on scientifically disproven assersions based on personal bias and bigotry. The other is based on a factual physical condition in the individuals (weather it be mostly a factor of physiological or environmental stimulus is irrelevant) that finds itself expressed in behavior. The difference between the two is that the majority of the world is not privy to the long established science that disproves the roots of racists views(supposed distinctive and consistent differences between the "races") nor is the majority of the world privy to the large body of evidence that currently suggests that homosexuality is a valid sexual orientation owing to a base physiological state where same sex attraction is highly probable in an individuals expressed sexual behavior. (Just as heterosexual sexual expression is a most likely outcome of base physiological states that are conducive to it's occurance in the indivual.) Environment and social constructs define the "taboo" of particular sexual expressions but genetics (physiological states) define the individuals sexual 'preference' outside of established local social constructs.

Some links providing more views:

http://www.religioustolerance.org/hom_fixe.htm

http://www.lesbian.org/amy/essays/queer-choice.html
Scott has posted for months on the Canon forum and no
one has commented on his signature...until he told someone he was
full of BS. It was only after that that the name-calling begun.
The fellow you are defending partially brought it upon himself.
So if I were to declare on my site that I was african american then that would open me up to be called "******" by an angry respondent? Your logic fails you here, the problem is in the mindset that would attack someone using a stated fact. This type of response hints at a bias against the statement made despite it's being irrevocable and indisputable, had we queried Roc's statements further we would have found root for his first assersion:
[snip] ..let me just say you are living a perverse life of sin and will > > probably contract aids if you have anal sex with men all the time.
"perverse life of sin" according to what body of scientific evidence? This hints at a religious source for his disagreement with the fact that scott is a homosexual. (Note: Scott doesn't say he's practicing or not...people commonly think that having homosexual tendancies and practicing homosexuality are mutually exclusive, they can coexist..just as heterosexuality and celibacy can ask any catholic priest.) This in fact is one of two portions of Roc's response that I considered offensive and abusive, the first being his use of the word "faggot" which holds hatred akin to the words "cracker", "******", "chink" and "spic". It's abusive because there is currently no way to establish that having homosexual tendancies or God forbid acting on them is in any way immoral or "perverse" in a global framework (in fact the scientific evidence contradicts this belief). The arbitrary nature of the generation of religious thought is such, that I can start a cult or sect or religious order tomorrow, that celebrates homosexuality as the key to immortality (and would attract many furvent followers) and it would be a valid religion just like any of the large monothiestic or smaller animist and polythiestic religions of the world.
Here's a post later in the same thread. Tolerance is needed here,
not expultion.
I agree that tolerance is needed, but anyone anywhere in the world should be free to express statements of fact like "I am a homosexual" and have that fact respected and tolerated anywhere else on the world. Scott didn't state anything that was inaccurate, he should not be punished by anyone for stating the facts. It's the rest of the world that needs to educate itself to how things work. Idealism
http://www.dpreview.com/forums/read.asp?forum=1010&message=3234223

Keep your wits about youselves...no need to sensor the site.
Abuse of the sort levied by Roc should not be tolerated at all and is expressly forbidden according to Phil's forum rules. If he says roc must go then so be it, he is "the man".

Regards,

--

 
It doesn't matter WHY people are uncivil or antagonistic. This is no place for either.
do you guys think that Phil should expell posters who put
inflamitory links in their signature? Scott did just that. I bet
if some poster had a link to a KKK site in his signature, you guys
would think he should be banished. What's the difference...they're
both lifestyle choices that some people find threatening and
offensive.
Expressing racists views and manifesting the physiological roots of
what is considered "homosexuality" in the form of homosexual acts
are completely different things. One thing (kkk racist views) is
based completely on scientifically disproven assersions based on
personal bias and bigotry. The other is based on a factual physical
condition in the individuals (weather it be mostly a factor of
physiological or environmental stimulus is irrelevant) that finds
itself expressed in behavior. The difference between the two is
that the majority of the world is not privy to the long established
science that disproves the roots of racists views(supposed
distinctive and consistent differences between the "races") nor is
the majority of the world privy to the large body of evidence that
currently suggests that homosexuality is a valid sexual orientation
owing to a base physiological state where same sex attraction is
highly probable in an individuals expressed sexual behavior. (Just
as heterosexual sexual expression is a most likely outcome of
base physiological states that are conducive to it's occurance in
the indivual.) Environment and social constructs define the "taboo"
of particular sexual expressions but genetics (physiological
states) define the individuals sexual 'preference' outside of
established local social constructs.

Some links providing more views:

http://www.religioustolerance.org/hom_fixe.htm

http://www.lesbian.org/amy/essays/queer-choice.html
Scott has posted for months on the Canon forum and no
one has commented on his signature...until he told someone he was
full of BS. It was only after that that the name-calling begun.
The fellow you are defending partially brought it upon himself.
So if I were to declare on my site that I was african american then
that would open me up to be called "******" by an angry respondent?
Your logic fails you here, the problem is in the mindset that would
attack someone using a stated fact. This type of response hints at
a bias against the statement made despite it's being irrevocable
and indisputable, had we queried Roc's statements further we would
have found root for his first assersion:
[snip] ..let me just say you are living a perverse life of sin and will > > probably contract aids if you have anal sex with men all the time.
"perverse life of sin" according to what body of scientific
evidence? This hints at a religious source for his disagreement
with the fact that scott is a homosexual. (Note: Scott doesn't
say he's practicing or not...people commonly think that having
homosexual tendancies and practicing homosexuality are mutually
exclusive, they can coexist..just as heterosexuality and celibacy
can ask any catholic priest.) This in fact is one of two portions
of Roc's response that I considered offensive and abusive, the
first being his use of the word "faggot" which holds hatred akin to
the words "cracker", "******", "chink" and "spic". It's abusive
because there is currently no way to establish that having
homosexual tendancies or God forbid acting on them is in any way
immoral or "perverse" in a global framework (in fact the scientific
evidence contradicts this belief). The arbitrary nature of the
generation of religious thought is such, that I can start a cult or
sect or religious order tomorrow, that celebrates homosexuality as
the key to immortality (and would attract many furvent followers)
and it would be a valid religion just like any of the large
monothiestic or smaller animist and polythiestic religions of the
world.
Here's a post later in the same thread. Tolerance is needed here,
not expultion.
I agree that tolerance is needed, but anyone anywhere in the world
should be free to express statements of fact like "I am a
homosexual" and have that fact respected and tolerated anywhere
else on the world. Scott didn't state anything that was inaccurate,
he should not be punished by anyone for stating the facts. It's the
rest of the world that needs to educate itself to how things work.
Idealism
http://www.dpreview.com/forums/read.asp?forum=1010&message=3234223

Keep your wits about youselves...no need to sensor the site.
Abuse of the sort levied by Roc should not be tolerated at all and
is expressly forbidden according to Phil's forum rules. If he says
roc must go then so be it, he is "the man".

Regards,

--

 
David, thanks for your thoughtful reply. I’m sorry to keep this thing going. But feel compelled to reply.

I agree with some of what you say. However, I reach somewhat different conclusions. If we are debating morality, I will agree with you that there are more moral problems with the hate groups than there are with homosexuals. However, that’s not the point. The point of my post where I brought up the kkk was that many people BELIEVE that homosexuality is “wrong”. Their belief that it is “wrong” is every bit as strong as your belief that “it is wrong to hate someone for his race”. To deny that people hold this belief is either naïve or myopic. Therefore, if you include a signature to a web site that celebrates homosexuality, you will incense some folk…just like you would were you to provide a link to a web site that celebrated “white supremacy”.

You cannot possibly think that making a scientific case based on studies that “prove” homosexuality to be a valid statistically determined behavior will diminish the controversy surrounding this issue. I’ve seen many attempts to use science to make the case for racism, for crying out loud!!. My point is that if you publicly declare yourself a member of a group whose behavior is considered taboo, and the behavior you celebrate openly flouts established norms of social and religious thought, you’d better be prepared for a little name calling. This is reality, not morality. A little discretion and a lot of tolerance will go a long way towards preventing unsavory threads such as this. This was the point of all my posts on this topic.

Cheers…I enjoyed reading your thoughts.

mango
 
Mango, thank you for your reply. I just wanted to clarify a few things.
David, thanks for your thoughtful reply. I’m sorry to keep this
thing going. But feel compelled to reply.

I agree with some of what you say. However, I reach somewhat
different conclusions. If we are debating morality, I will agree
with you that there are more moral problems with the hate groups
than there are with homosexuals. However, that’s not the point.
The point of my post where I brought up the kkk was that many
people BELIEVE that homosexuality is “wrong”. Their belief that it

is “wrong” is every bit as strong as your belief that “it is wrong
to hate someone for his race”. To deny that people hold this
belief is either naïve or myopic. Therefore, if you include a
signature to a web site that celebrates homosexuality, you will
incense some folk…just like you would were you to provide a link to
a web site that celebrated “white supremacy”.

You cannot possibly think that making a scientific case based on
studies that “prove” homosexuality to be a valid statistically
determined behavior will diminish the controversy surrounding this
issue.
The controversy will diminish in time with education, in time. Just as the "controversy" of a "black" person sitting at the front of a city bus in Alabama diminished in time. The dream of a future where the majority of societies across the globe are agnostic to a mismatch in ones sexual orientation(what their mate preference is..) and physical sexual alignment(what they look like..) is an ideal we should hope and work for, not damn away because current reality is not yet at that state.
I’ve seen many attempts to use science to make the case for
racism, for crying out loud!!.
Yes, and all fall by the wayside under rigorous scrutiny, that's the beauty of the scientific method. It enables a "natural selection" of right ideas (in the context of conformance to reality) from wrong ones.
My point is that if you publicly
declare yourself a member of a group whose behavior is considered
taboo, and the behavior you celebrate openly flouts established
norms of social and religious thought, you’d better be prepared for
a little name calling.
True, and all I was saying is that this type of reaction is unwarranted. I didn't say that it didn't occur, it sure does. My point is that education and time will get through all the backward thinking that propagates such childish behavior (the religious thoughts being the major hurdle to overcome) if we who know are brave enough to speak up and educate the misinformed.
This is reality, not morality.
Ideally, we should be moving toward a more moral world, despite the fact that our currrent societal reality is so underdeveloped. It's funny you state this, as I was going to continue in my last post to cover the reality/morality opening that I (accidentally) left open in my position. Just because a majority of people who would react with hate at the very casual reference to a persons sexual orientation on his site (the same as if you stated "I have a wife and two kids" on yours) exists, doesn't mean that those who know better should remain silent. "That's just the way it is." is the quote that comes to mind, had brave and intelligent individuals of the past held similar modes of thought, we'd still be living in caves and catching antelope for dinner! Chris, had a right to casually state his orientation without catching flack exactly as you have the right to state you have a wife and two kids without catching flack, societal norms and religious thought be damned, those are the temporary problems not the permanant facts. It's our job to teach the potential hatethrowers why they should be accepting instead.
A little
discretion and a lot of tolerance will go a long way towards
preventing unsavory threads such as this. This was the point of
all my posts on this topic.
A sentiment I agree with whole heartedly but i'll add 'and a lot of education will go a long way ...'.
Cheers…I enjoyed reading your thoughts.

mango
I enjoyed reading yours as well.

Regards,

--

 

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