Let's see. If I'm in auto-aperture mode, and I change EC to -2 ,then the aperture gets smaller by two stops. ISO is unaffected. If I increase ISO then aperture also gets smaller by two stops but this time the image will be processed differently. Is that what I want?
If the purpose of this adjustment was to properly expose the grey cat sitting in the middle of the dark background, then I don't want my camera to interpret the dark background as middle grey. I want it to correctly process the dark background as a dark background, and the grey cat for the middle grey that it is. Whatever internal things it may do, I want it to at least know my intention for the image.
The problem here is that in the RAW file itself, there is no concept of "middle grey". There is only a concept of how much light was recorded at each pixel.
The mapping of a certain amount of light to "middle grey" happens when the raw file is processed. The same amount of light might map to black white, dark grey, light grey or middle grey depending on the settings used for the processing. Even at the same ISO, the mapping may differ with options light Highlight Tone Priority, Auto Lightening, or various Picture Modes.
So when you say you want to "properly expose", what you really mean is that you want to get an exposure, such then when processed will produce a middle grey,
and that you want to use some sort of standard processing (perhaps the camera's processing given the current settings).
This is not an unreasonable workflow, as it can result in excellent quality, and it is quite easy. I call this workflow "exposing for the JPEG" because the goal is to get a good looking camera-produced JPEG preview image. (The camera produces a JPEG preview, even when you are shooting RAW).
However, this is not the workflow that maximizes image quality (lowest noise, maximum dynamic range). The optimal workflow involves using the highest exposure that does not blow out important highlights.
In many circumstances the difference between the JPEG workflow and the optimum workflow is not significant, and a human eye may not see a difference in the final print. You can make a good case that if you can't see the difference in the final print, the difference is insignificant.
However is some situations, such as scenes with dark shadows, there can be a visible difference between the optimum exposure and the JPEG exposure. In those circumstance you may want to use the optimum exposure, and fine tune the RAW processing by hand.
This is similar to the film workflow, where exposure determined negative density, and the lightness/darkness of the image as determined when you printed.
I guess this is just a long way of saying that there isn't a single "correct exposure" with digital. The correct exposure is the one that matches your intended processing of the raw data.
With film or when shooting JPEG, you generally get the best results when your mid tones are exposed to match the ISO spec for the selected ISO. In other words you are concerned with the mid tones.
When shooting RAW, you get the best results when you are concerned about the highlights.
Indeed, matrix and spot metering can solve this problem, too. And what they're doing is the same thing ... using the ISO setting to determine exposure the part of the image you identify. The remaining portions fall way they may on the histogram.
The problem with traditional matrix metering, is that it is generally concerned about midtones, not highlights.