What gear does everyone else seem to love that doesn't work for you?
- UV filters
- "travel" tripods
- monopods
- "fully" articulated LCDs that you cannot tilt
- Billingham bags
What do you find wrong with Billingham Bags? I have three of them, they rarely go far but they are very sturdy.
Just for fun, I asked ChatGPT to explain to me what is wrong with Billingham bags in style of Anthony Jeselnik.
"Price isn’t the problem with Billingham bags. It’s that they’re perfect… at everything except being a bag."
Sure, they’re beautifully made. Waxed canvas, brass fittings, heritage stitching—each one looks like it should come with a letter from Winston Churchill. But then you try to use it, and suddenly it’s less “camera bag” and more “very handsome obstacle.”
Opening a Billingham is like breaking into Fort Knox—but less convenient. You want quick access to your camera? Too bad. First, undo the leather straps. Then the flap. Then the inner flap. Then the zipper. By the time you're ready to shoot, the moment’s gone — and so is the sunset and your will to live.
It’s weatherproof, sure. So weatherproof, it can survive a monsoon. Unfortunately, you won’t, because you'll be standing in the rain trying to remember which pocket you stuffed your lens wipes in.
The compartments? Oh, they’re customizable. But only after you’ve taken a class in Victorian origami and accepted that your 70-200mm lens might have to live diagonally forever.
And don’t even get me started on the shoulder strap. It’s like Billingham wants you to feel every ounce of heritage on your shoulder blade.
But you won’t complain—because it looks incredible. People don’t ask you about your camera anymore. They ask about your bag. Which is great… unless you’re a photographer.
So no, price isn’t the issue. It’s that Billingham made the most beautiful bag in the world… and then dared you to actually use it.