It is always the distance that is the flattering or not.
It is the photographer task to understand the composition, meaning perspective, camera angle, angle of view and field of view, as addition to motion, timing, hard/soft light, and timing as well the subjects and objects in the frame by their nature of colors, shapes, size and philosophical, cultural etc meanings (ie black vs white, big vs small, old vs new etc). And that eventually requires the photographer to have very good situational awareness what to include and what not, where the camera is positioned and what the camera settings are used.
And one of the most easiest mistake people do, is to fill the frame with the subject regardless what focal length they are using.
Then they hear the common claims "85mm is the portrait focal length" like "rule of thumb" and mistake it "35mm will distort the person face!" and they easily conclude that 85mm is better than 35mm because 35mm does distortion. And they don't think that at all why it happens as we have two eyes instead a one and we focus our attention to totally different ways to person face in front of us, than to photograph of them.
So just learning to keep a optimal distance regardless of the focal length, will help a lot to get far more flattering image. And that requires as well to people not to be afraid to crop.
With a film, cropping was almost required one, just to get sharp edges or when framing the photo you added some crop there with passepartout or frames.
With digital so many is terrorized from cropping that they try to fill the frame every time. Be it how lens sharpness is bad or Mpix count is too low or sensor is too small etc.
Why 12mm is better than 17mm as it gives more cropping power, more possibilities than 17mm as you still can get as close as 17mm but require only crop later more accurately and better.
Why as OP, I would get either 17mm f/1.8 if that is really wanted focal length, but I would likely look even a 12mm f/2, even when it is T/2.2 vs T/2 that you get with f/1.8 lenses.
I would instead spending money for PRO, spend it to some denoise application as you get couple stops denoise effect and be easily using ISO 6400 almost all the places.