Any books you would recommend as a starting point to understand this better?
No...as far as I'm aware there are no books that really get into the details and methologies of using the exposure controls on a modern camera. There are a couple reasons for this. The first is that the modern methods are still unknown to most people. Second is that different cameras have different abilities...there are no standards. Probably the best way to find a book is to ask in the forum for the camera you've bought.
Just about any book or website claiming to teach exposure will tell you the same thing. First, they say to shoot in manual mode "to take full control of your camera" (which, in truth, has nothing to do with having full control of your camera.) Second, they will describe the exposure triangle...the relationship between aperture, shutter, and ISO as it applies to exposure.
The jist of the triangular relationship is very simple to understand. If you double one of the three, then you must halve one of the remaining two to have the same exposure. Personally, I doubt if this ever helped anyone to set the exposure on their modern camera.
Using manual mode does not give you control of your camera. Even in manual mode, you are a slave to the meter. If all you're doing is moving the meter indicator to the center of the meter, then you're doing exactly what the auto modes are doing. With manual mode you can override the meter's suggestion by moving the indicator left or right of center. But the camera provides such a function for auto modes called Exposure Compensation. With manual mode the exposure you set remains set even if the camera moves. But the camera provides such a function for auto modes called AE Lock. The bottom line is that there's nothing that manual mode does that the auto modes on a modern camera can't do as long as the meter is working. And that's why manual mode is still important...for times when the meter doesn't work (astrophotography, long exposures, certain type of flash exposures, etc.) Otherwise, if the meter works then manual mode is the wrong mode.
After bad-mouthing auto modes, telling you to use manual, and describing the exposure triangle, these books and websites might go so far as to explain why 18% gray is important (or 12.7%...depending on who you read.) If it's explained properly, then you've finally received a useful bit of knowledge. At this point many explanations end, leaving you with no idea as to how to effectively use the numerous auto-exposure features that are available...preferring instead to leave you using your modern miracle of technology as if it were a 60 year old Kodak Reflex.
The reality, though, is that people say they want to control their camera...but they really don't. There are people who claim to use manual mode for "total control", but their EXIF data shows that they use Matrix/Evaluative metering and Auto White Balance when shooting. They may be in manual mode, but they're far, far closer to using the camera like a Point & Shoot than having any actual control. And there's the problem...if you take control of the camera, then you have to actually control the camera...and that's not easy. People want easy.
That's why cameras these days have face detection (which is great, actually) and other technologies to make your life easier. You can get a lot done with your camera without knowing all the ins and outs of exposure. Probably the first thing to learn about is setting white balance to correct color. Auto white balance is terrible indoors, and knowing how to set WB will fix that yellow cast that indoor shots sometimes have. Once color is fixed you want to learn about Exposure Compensation. That function allows you to increase or reduce the brightness of the image. Your camera manual will likely have all the info you need to learn how to adjust WB and EC. With correct color and brightness, you can take a lot of good images. I'd say the next thing to learn after that is composition. For that read Jodie Coston's lesson found here...
http://www.morguefile.com/docs/index.php/Jodie_Coston:_Lesson_1
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