The ABSOLUTE TRUTH about FOCUS and Other DSLR problems REVEALED!

Started Jul 22, 2003 | Discussions
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Robert Vance Regular Member • Posts: 379
The ABSOLUTE TRUTH about FOCUS and Other DSLR problems REVEALED!

Since DIGITAL CAMERAS ARE essentially COMPUTERS with interchangeable lenses, the truth about our DSLR cameras can finally be REVEALED.

• Because the cameras are a conduit for unique type of energy, is possible for nature spirits (called vaettir) to take up residence within it.

• Do not curse, yell, smack or otherwise venture anger or your camera. Most vaettir are extremely sensitive to emotions.

• The motions are energy, and mixing incompatible energy fields can have bad results: cumulating in the dreaded “blue screen of death” camera malaise.

• [Cleanse is your camera] by sound. Either clap your hands around the camera or use a rattle. A handful of coins in an old 35 mm film canister works just as well-the object is to break up stagnant energy.

• Put unusual and pretty things by your camera for the vaettir’s enjoyment. Pretty stones, crystals, feathers, intriguing pictures help create a positive environment.

• TURN THE CAMERA OFF COMPLETELY WHEN YOU ARE WORKING MAGIC. I can not emphasize this enough. .I’ve had friends who’ve had their camera completely crash due to simple energy overload when they inadvertently left them on while doing the spellwork

This information comes from August issue of Popular Science magazine, page 86 and is titled “the real reason your computer keeps crashing” (as published in the spring 2003 edition of New Witch magazine)
More for the modern witch at http://www.newwitch.com

Broid Regular Member • Posts: 118
Re: The ABSOLUTE TRUTH about FOCUS and Other DSLR problems REVEALED!

I know lots of people believe lots of different things. I am sure that I will be flamed for what I have to say. Robert, I am praying for your salvation. You need to know the love and forgivness that only God can give. Having said that on a DSLR forum may not be the approprate place, but your post comes from so far out of left field that I wanted to respond. If the moderator feels the need to delete this post, so be it. I believe Robert, that you need the Lord.

Alright, now everybody else can flame on for my post. I believe what I said.

Broid

"Where will you spend eternity?"

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Triggerhappy Contributing Member • Posts: 722
Re: The ABSOLUTE TRUTH about FOCUS and Other DSLR problems REVEALED!

Thank you so much. It explains evrything
have fun
d

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FunD2h Contributing Member • Posts: 740
LOL!! Very funny!! (nt)

Robert Vance wrote:

Since DIGITAL CAMERAS ARE essentially COMPUTERS with
interchangeable lenses, the truth about our DSLR cameras can
finally be REVEALED.

• Because the cameras are a conduit for unique type of energy, is
possible for nature spirits (called vaettir) to take up residence
within it.
• Do not curse, yell, smack or otherwise venture anger or your
camera. Most vaettir are extremely sensitive to emotions.
• The motions are energy, and mixing incompatible energy fields can
have bad results: cumulating in the dreaded “blue screen of death”
camera malaise.
• [Cleanse is your camera] by sound. Either clap your hands around
the camera or use a rattle. A handful of coins in an old 35 mm
film canister works just as well-the object is to break up stagnant
energy.
• Put unusual and pretty things by your camera for the vaettir’s
enjoyment. Pretty stones, crystals, feathers, intriguing pictures
help create a positive environment.
• TURN THE CAMERA OFF COMPLETELY WHEN YOU ARE WORKING MAGIC. I can
not emphasize this enough. .I’ve had friends who’ve had their
camera completely crash due to simple energy overload when they
inadvertently left them on while doing the spellwork

This information comes from August issue of Popular Science
magazine, page 86 and is titled “the real reason your computer
keeps crashing” (as published in the spring 2003 edition of New
Witch magazine)
More for the modern witch at http://www.newwitch.com

-- hide signature --

Ken

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BillDrew Senior Member • Posts: 1,869
Equally Valid

Broid, that is why I am sure you are supporting the current move to teach the techniques outlined by Robert to camera repair techs as alternate and equally valid.

Legislation of that kind will take effect in Kansas next year

Broid wrote:

I know lots of people believe lots of different things. I am sure
that I will be flamed for what I have to say. Robert, I am praying
for your salvation. You need to know the love and forgivness that
only God can give. Having said that on a DSLR forum may not be the
approprate place, but your post comes from so far out of left field
that I wanted to respond. If the moderator feels the need to delete
this post, so be it. I believe Robert, that you need the Lord.

Alright, now everybody else can flame on for my post. I believe
what I said.

Broid

"Where will you spend eternity?"

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wrphoto Regular Member • Posts: 384
For Broid

Broid wrote:

I know lots of people believe lots of different things. I am sure
that I will be flamed for what I have to say. Robert, I am praying
for your salvation. You need to know the love and forgivness that
only God can give. Having said that on a DSLR forum may not be the
approprate place, but your post comes from so far out of left field
that I wanted to respond. If the moderator feels the need to delete
this post, so be it. I believe Robert, that you need the Lord.

Alright, now everybody else can flame on for my post. I believe
what I said.

Broid

"Where will you spend eternity?"

-- hide signature --

I think(hope) that this post was done tounge in cheek.

Having said that, I agree with you. We all need to know the awesome forgiveness only the Lord Jesus brings. I am not a religous person, but I love God.

When I used to spend time in the darkroom and something would go wrong, I remember referring to it as darkroom "gremlins". In a way, I guess the DSLR problems we encounter are similar in nature, a technical problem that needs to be overcome.

Walt Roycraft
Walt Roycraft Photography
http://www.portfolios.com/wrphoto

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Walt Palmer Regular Member • Posts: 233
In your heart, you know Broid's right.

Broid's right. This is absolutely ridiculous nonsense, and someone out there might take it seriously, even though it's clearly done tongue-in-cheek. There are no "nature spirits" living in your camera, it's clearly demonic posession - and it only takes over your camera if you are trying to do good work with your camera - or if your body is a useless tool for he forces of darkness. Occasionally, I get reports of some photog who's really faithful and is being subjected to the trials of Job, but those are rare cases and can benefit from the same treatment protocol as regular posession. No amount of beauty and chanting is going to remove the spirit - you need real salvation and exorcism based on real faith to remove a demon.

Think about it, think again.

OK, back to work.

Broid wrote:

I know lots of people believe lots of different things. I am sure
that I will be flamed for what I have to say. Robert, I am praying
for your salvation. You need to know the love and forgivness that
only God can give. Having said that on a DSLR forum may not be the
approprate place, but your post comes from so far out of left field
that I wanted to respond. If the moderator feels the need to delete
this post, so be it. I believe Robert, that you need the Lord.

Alright, now everybody else can flame on for my post. I believe
what I said.

Broid

"Where will you spend eternity?"

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Broid Regular Member • Posts: 118
withccraft and your camera

Okay, time to get back to the real purpose for this forum, pro digital talk.
Broid

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BobTrips Veteran Member • Posts: 7,848
Re: In your heart, you know Broid's right.

Walt Palmer wrote:

Broid's right. This is absolutely ridiculous nonsense, and someone
out there might take it seriously, even though it's clearly done
tongue-in-cheek. There are no "nature spirits" living in your
camera, it's clearly demonic posession - and it only takes over
your camera if you are trying to do good work with your camera - or
if your body is a useless tool for he forces of darkness.
Occasionally, I get reports of some photog who's really faithful
and is being subjected to the trials of Job, but those are rare
cases and can benefit from the same treatment protocol as regular
posession. No amount of beauty and chanting is going to remove the
spirit - you need real salvation and exorcism based on real faith
to remove a demon.

Think about it, think again.

OK, back to work.

Maybe we should try burning a few digitals at the stake? Or would a simple dunking be enough?

-- hide signature --

bob
Latest offering - 'Two Hours in Delhi'
http://www.pbase.com/bobtrips
Shots from a bunch of places (esp. SEA and Nepal).
Pictures for friends, not necessarily my best.

http://www.trekearth.com/members/BobTrips/photos/
My better 'attempts'.

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aaron Senior Member • Posts: 1,287
sorry broid

but the lord closed down his digital focus hocus pokus repair and incantation shop back in '97. where have you been? nope, roberts methods are the only hope for now until jc gets off his lazy butt and gets back in the game. god no longer gives a damn about your cameras! (digital anyway, i hear he still does the occasional CLA on kowa's or mamiya universal's just for fun)

Broid wrote:

I know lots of people believe lots of different things. I am sure
that I will be flamed for what I have to say. Robert, I am praying
for your salvation. You need to know the love and forgivness that
only God can give. Having said that on a DSLR forum may not be the
approprate place, but your post comes from so far out of left field
that I wanted to respond. If the moderator feels the need to delete
this post, so be it. I believe Robert, that you need the Lord.

Alright, now everybody else can flame on for my post. I believe
what I said.

Broid

"Where will you spend eternity?"

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Frank Nichols Senior Member • Posts: 1,814
uh, it's a joke - lighten up already...(nt)

Broid wrote:

I know lots of people believe lots of different things. I am sure
that I will be flamed for what I have to say. Robert, I am praying
for your salvation. You need to know the love and forgivness that
only God can give. Having said that on a DSLR forum may not be the
approprate place, but your post comes from so far out of left field
that I wanted to respond. If the moderator feels the need to delete
this post, so be it. I believe Robert, that you need the Lord.

Alright, now everybody else can flame on for my post. I believe
what I said.

Broid

"Where will you spend eternity?"

-- hide signature --

Someday I will take a good photograph - until then I will blame my equipment.

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Broid Regular Member • Posts: 118
Re: uh, it's a joke - lighten up already...(nt)

Not funny to me, I'll laugh when it is.
B.

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graphius Regular Member • Posts: 168
way too funny a thread (nt)

aaron wrote:
but the lord closed down his digital focus hocus pokus repair and
incantation shop back in '97. where have you been? nope, roberts
methods are the only hope for now until jc gets off his lazy butt
and gets back in the game. god no longer gives a damn about your
cameras! (digital anyway, i hear he still does the occasional CLA
on kowa's or mamiya universal's just for fun)

Broid wrote:

I know lots of people believe lots of different things. I am sure
that I will be flamed for what I have to say. Robert, I am praying
for your salvation. You need to know the love and forgivness that
only God can give. Having said that on a DSLR forum may not be the
approprate place, but your post comes from so far out of left field
that I wanted to respond. If the moderator feels the need to delete
this post, so be it. I believe Robert, that you need the Lord.

Alright, now everybody else can flame on for my post. I believe
what I said.

Broid

"Where will you spend eternity?"

Reply   Reply with quote   Complain
motofoto Contributing Member • Posts: 544
This is really page 1 ...

of the "Canon Authorized Service Manual" used to train their camera techs.

I'm surprized they have not sued over copyright.

Regards,
Mike
--
'shoot early, shoot often'

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Robert Vance OP Regular Member • Posts: 379
Broid: Thank you for your prayers :)

And I pray for your sense of humor. Well, at least your in my prayers too.

I only reported on what I read in a well circulated publication.

I am not the author. Do you feel all that relate the "facts" are cursed?

Well, the relating of this article would include millions of people who had their hands in its publication and my repeating of it. Let's see... Dell and its employees, for selling me the means to use the internet-and all contributing manufactures to its composition-also the stockholders of Dell stock...Next my Logitech keyboard and mouse & monitor manufactures (and stockholders again)... the US postal service and Fed Ex...Telephone & cable company...Popular Science mag...the New York school system that learned me to read and write [well, OK, I can't argue about them :)) ] etc, etc, etc...All share in my guilt EXCEPT for Phil, who hasn't read this post.

My belief system was not shaken by this article.

In fact, though I question it's merits, only I can't help to smile when I read it.

This is not meant to confuse or offend your beliefs.

Be Well.

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Doug MacMillan Senior Member • Posts: 1,841
Bumper Sticker

Broid wrote:

"Where will you spend eternity?"

Reminds me of the bumper sticker:

In case of Rapture, can I have your car?

Doug
Ordained Presbyterian Elder

 Doug MacMillan's gear list:Doug MacMillan's gear list
Canon EOS 5D Mark II Canon EF 85mm f/1.8 USM Canon EF 135mm f/2.0L USM Canon EF 17-40mm f/4.0L USM Canon EF 70-200mm f/2.8L USM +1 more
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Broid Regular Member • Posts: 118
Re: Broid: Thank you for your prayers :)

Did not offend or confuse me in the slightest, please don't misunderstand me. I am not offended or confused by what anybody believes. But I do take the things of the spirit very seriously because it involves eternity. If that post was intended as a joke, then I will indeed take it as a joke. Got as much humor as the next guy, no problem there. I went to the site link from that post and I can assure you that the originators of that article were very serious about that information. We can all laugh and have fun, but they are serious. Even with all that seriousness, I can and will have a good laugh along with the rest of you, but witches and witchcraft are very real, and in my opinion, not very safe or healthy from a spiritual perspective.

But, like I added, this is a photo forum, let's get back to the reason for this forum, we can talk about this other stuff elsewhere.

Thanks for your tolerance,
B.

Robert Vance wrote:

And I pray for your sense of humor. Well, at least your in my
prayers too.

I only reported on what I read in a well circulated publication.

I am not the author. Do you feel all that relate the "facts" are
cursed?

Well, the relating of this article would include millions of people
who had their hands in its publication and my repeating of it.
Let's see... Dell and its employees, for selling me the means to
use the internet-and all contributing manufactures to its
composition-also the stockholders of Dell stock...Next my Logitech
keyboard and mouse & monitor manufactures (and stockholders
again)... the US postal service and Fed Ex...Telephone & cable
company...Popular Science mag...the New York school system that
learned me to read and write [well, OK, I can't argue about them
:)) ] etc, etc, etc...All share in my guilt EXCEPT for Phil, who
hasn't read this post.

My belief system was not shaken by this article.

In fact, though I question it's merits, only I can't help to smile
when I read it.

This is not meant to confuse or offend your beliefs.

Be Well.

-- hide signature --

'Where will you spend eternity?'

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Jeffrey Knapp Regular Member • Posts: 355
Funny stuff and thanks for posting! (nt)

Jeff-at-work

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Keith D. Brooks Regular Member • Posts: 201
Re: withccraft and your camera

Booooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

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teknomad Junior Member • Posts: 31
Re: The ABSOLUTE TRUTH about FOCUS and Other DSLR problems REVEALED!

Thanks for the "enlightening" thread. LOL

I shall note the posters' names.
Now I know where the nuts are on both sides of the digital divide.

Véronique

Robert Vance wrote:

Since DIGITAL CAMERAS ARE essentially COMPUTERS with
interchangeable lenses, the truth about our DSLR cameras can
finally be REVEALED.

• Because the cameras are a conduit for unique type of energy, is
possible for nature spirits (called vaettir) to take up residence
within it.
• Do not curse, yell, smack or otherwise venture anger or your
camera. Most vaettir are extremely sensitive to emotions.
• The motions are energy, and mixing incompatible energy fields can
have bad results: cumulating in the dreaded “blue screen of death”
camera malaise.
• [Cleanse is your camera] by sound. Either clap your hands around
the camera or use a rattle. A handful of coins in an old 35 mm
film canister works just as well-the object is to break up stagnant
energy.
• Put unusual and pretty things by your camera for the vaettir’s
enjoyment. Pretty stones, crystals, feathers, intriguing pictures
help create a positive environment.
• TURN THE CAMERA OFF COMPLETELY WHEN YOU ARE WORKING MAGIC. I can
not emphasize this enough. .I’ve had friends who’ve had their
camera completely crash due to simple energy overload when they
inadvertently left them on while doing the spellwork

This information comes from August issue of Popular Science
magazine, page 86 and is titled “the real reason your computer
keeps crashing” (as published in the spring 2003 edition of New
Witch magazine)
More for the modern witch at http://www.newwitch.com

Reply   Reply with quote   Complain
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