How can any wedding photographer get the shots with the 800?

Exactly. I trust roger at lensrentals more than people on internet forums.

My d800 is fine. It's not perfect every single time, but NO camera is perfect every single time.

36mp is simply helping you to notice the little errors. I absolutely guarantee that the D700, D3, D3s or D3x were any better. You're just noticing more with the d800 therefore it "seems" worse.

I get those subtle AF errors too sometimes but if you view the file at 12mp size, it's absolutely fine.

--
My travel photography blog - http://www.frescoglobe.com