What to buy with 1000$

Here are my requirements

1. good pictures-hence dSLR vs a prosumer cam
2. 1 lens

3. I like having a superzoom, so i am inclined to getting a tamron 18-250 which costs 500$
4. inclined towards pentax dSLRs because of built in IS

So, the question is, should I get

1. K100d(~ 400$ for body only) + tamron 18-250 lens( 500$)?

OR

2. give up superzoom or get used to changing lenses and get a K10d( 800) + cheap 2 kit lenses

OR

3. Canon powershot S5 and forget about getting a dSLR. The S5 has a movie mode and has a built in superzoom. The tradeoff is a much smaller sensor, more noise at higher ISO, but how often would the higher ISO and a large sensor benefit me? I also read that the lens on the S5 isn't very good compared to dSLR lenses.

Concluding remarks- I am very frustrated right now. I wish someone could just point out a camera for me and say- here, for under 1000$, this camera will do everything you want. I basically just want a camera that takes dSLR quality pictures, records movies(I really would like to record some movies), and has a quality lens. I am sure a lot of you guys wish for the same thing, and maybe I am ranting. Anyhow, does anyone have any advice on what I should buy?